Experience 30-minute Issue Coaching session
Category

Risk

Behavior, change, coaching, community, Decision making, fulfillment, Literacy, Risk

In the Interest of Civility . . . Try this

What causes tunnel vision?

We encourage people, especially students, to focus on what is important to them, yet we must keep an open mind.

As an instructor of all ages–children and adults–I wonder what causes people to continue in a belief even when evidence appears to refute their point of view.

Here is my opinion of what happens from my observations:

·      No one likes to be corrected or made to be wrong. It puts one on the defensive and creates discomfort, especially if the correction is done in a group.

·      Holding to an idea is like a security blanket; it’s familiar. The idea holds comfort for us. In order to shift an opinion, one has to feel safe. The internal dialogue may go like this, “If I was wrong about that, what else could I be wrong about?” It creates insecurity.

·      A change could create internal conflict, and the person thinks, “I avoid conflict at all costs!” Typically risk averse of non-confrontational styles.

·      One can feel manipulated if s/he changes one’s mind.

·      People who want to control everything may have difficulty with an open mind. Their thoughts my fly away.

·      Wishful or magical thinking enters the idea. Much like children who discover who Santa Claus really is, the wishful thinking aspect can continue the illusion.

·      One’s identity is tied to the belief. An idea or point of view may become vulnerable if information sheds new light on it.

Why is this discussion important?

To make mistakes is essential to learning. However, our American culture doesn’t allow much room for that—we’re off seeking the “right” answer. That’s why our educational system needs refurbishing. More question asking and less answer teaching to the test will open students’ minds.

I recommend the following: rather than combat these styles of thinking, it may be helpful to shift our perception and acknowledge that no one needs to be right; we may just need to be different. This line of thinking only works when danger or threats are removed from the situation. Unfortunately, an immediate turn to violence is all some people have been raised to know. Here is where teaching critical thinking in school is important. Also, real debate is essential to understand evidence and facts.

Encourage students to participate in debates based on documentable research from multiple sources. Encourage discussions at the dinner table or among friends even if you’re uncomfortable. We can all continue to learn. Be sure to lay out ground rules before you begin; for example, no name-calling or swearing.

Find out how they reached their conclusion. You will learn a lot about how the speaker thinks in this process, and that will improve overall communication. We could all benefit from better listeners.

Delivery of the information is also important. We must remove judgment from the topic and come to a logical conclusion based on the research posed. This is difficult and is a learned behavior. Be patient. Good luck, and let’s all communicate to better understand each other. MC

 

Action plan, business plan, entrepreneurs, failure, Marketing, Risk, small business, start up, Strategic Plan

Turn Your Hobby Into A Business










After watching the video, create a worksheet.

Jot down notes and answer these questions:
Did you begin?
1. What stopped you?

  • Fear
  • Lack of confidence
  • Influence of others
  • Your __________

2. Define your strategic plan in three sentences.

  •     Define your objectives within your plan
  •     Define your goals within your plan


3. How solid are your resources?

  •     Credit cards? (Hint: Bad idea)
  •     Small business loan
  •     Savings
  •     401 (k)  
  •     Other

In what stage is your business plan?

  • Would you invest in this idea if you were a stranger?
  • Write out 10 single key words to describe your enterprise.
  • Write out 10 ways people would search in phrases (long-tail SEO) for your offering.
  • Who are two competitors in your channel?
  • What do you know about them? Write what you know and then research them.
  • What are three unique characteristics of your offering different than two competitors?
  • What is the worst thing that could happen to your business?
  • What is the best thing that could happen to the business?
This sheet will help you get started—Do it today!

Who needs coaching? Maybe you do to get this starship launched!

Your coach,
  CPCC, ACC
Positive Potentials LLC



©2015  Michelle Cubas All Rights Reserved.




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Behavior, communication, cooperation, Decision making, Risk, Value, Wisdom

When did you last repair someone’s trust?

Confidential coaching positions me to bear witness to a myriad of circumstances. Within that context, I am asked many questions. How to repair trust is one that is poignant.

When trust is bruised or “killed”, there can be a physical feeling of an open wound. We can empathize with some who was betrayed. If remorse sets in, the betrayer also can experience the “wound.”

There are a few ways one can attempt to build trust. Ultimately, we can never account for someone else’s behavior or thinking, just our own. We must not allow others to define who we are and what we stand for. 

Yes, everyone makes mistakes. The gift that will emerge for you is awareness, because you are making an honest effort.

So, what can we do to begin a healing process for broken trust:

  1. Show up with a sincere, contrite apology. Sometimes a written one is powerful so the recipient has time to process it. In few words, be specific about what you are apologizing for, i.e. did you hurt someone’s feelings, was there a misunderstanding, did you strike out at someone?
  2. Own it, and learn from the circumstance no matter how painful. Analyze what you did and how you can avoid such behavior in the future.
  3. Back off. Give the recipient time to absorb your apology. 
  4. In the meantime, do what you say you will do. Talk is cheap.
  5. Actions speak louder than words, so make an effort to support the recipient by being present for him or her.
  6.  Be consistent with your renewed outreach. Be who you say you are.

Ultimately, the apology was delivered. After that, it is up to the injured party to invite you back into their lives. You’ll know. -MC



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